The Old Wooden House eBook - Bond Over a Snooze!
💤 The Book So Boring, Kids Can't Fight Sleep
Parents: Finally win bedtime battles with intentional monotony
✅ Guaranteed Results: "My 4yo slept 60% faster!" - Catherine, Wensleydale
✅ Instant Download: PDF/EPUB ready tonight
✅ 6-Month Money Back: Doesn't work? Full refund. No quibbles.
Why Exhausted Parents Choose This:
- No dragons/villains/suspense/plot: Just 32 pages of hammocks and apple trees
- Scientifically dull: Repetitive phrasing lowers heart rate
- Works worldwide: Tested on NZ, UK, & Russian kids (yours are next!)
Stats That Matter:
> ⏱️ Avg. sleep time: 09 min (beta tests)
> 📚 87% parents rebuy for siblings/nephews/nieces
With no plot, no excitement, and no distractions - just the soothing, repetitive narrative about a quiet evening in a sleepy orchard - this story is a parent's magic charm for bedtime. Paired with gentle stage directions for a slow, calming read, it's guaranteed to bore kids to sleep while quietly amusing parents with its clever simplicity.
Perfect for restless little ones and exhausted grown-ups alike.
- What You Get: PDF and ePUB files
- Why It Works: Soothes restless anklebiters and exhausted grown-ups alike.
You'll get a sweetly sleeping child, and the urge to go to bed yourself. Share this snooze-fest with a fellow parent!